Pitfire Pizza, Dubai: It’s the Closest Thing I Have to Religion
Pitfire Pizza Dubai Hills is more than a new pizza joint; it’s a linchpin of Dubai’s community.
I am not a religious man. I do not go to church or other places of worship. Those are places for other people. I insist others pray or follow as they please, especially during these times. That’s what good, tolerant, and forward-thinking societies are made of.
However, I am of a particular devotion, of a certain persuasion. I firmly believe in the sacred and transformative power of food. I am a comfort eater, for a start. Bored, anxious or worried, I will scrounge cupboards and surfaces looking for an antidote.
Come to think of it, any occasion is immeasurably improved by, say, good bread dragged through a luxurious dip or a cold chicken leg pulled from the fridge, studded with barnacle-sized flakes of sea salt.
To repurpose a Madame Bollinger quote:
I eat when I’m happy, and snack when I’m sad. Sometimes, I graze when I’m alone. When I have company, I consider it obligatory. I trifle with it when I’m not hungry, and I devour when I am.
So, on a Friday during Ramadan—a Holy day amid auspicious times—I find myself inside the gleaming, new Pitfire Pizza in Dubai Hills Business Park surrounded by friends, their family, the presence of my parents visiting from Portugal, my wife, and my newish-born son. Here, a team of eight (and a half) who share an admiration for Pitfire order almost everything on the menu.
A basket of warm garlic knots are baked for our congregation, all dusted with what looks like Parmesan cheese and parsley. These garlic knots are carbohydrate-dense bow-ties, so soft, they tear apart almost telepathically and hum with garlic and butter, as some of the best things in life often do. If you’ve ever watched a pelican choke down a fish, you’ve seen me eat Pitfire’s garlic knots. A ramekin of black truffle dipping sauce easily lubricates their consumption. So popular are these garlic knots, they should have their own Instagram account.
Pitfire Pizza is no longer a bolthole in Jumeirah Lakes Towers. Couple and Pitfire Pizza co-founders Bill and Michele Johnson spread the brand’s wings beyond JLT to Time Out Market Dubai, Mirdiff, Arjan and more. The latest incarnation in Dubai Hills is the Full Monty of the brand’s beating heart.
Pitfire Pizza Dubai Hills is built on good times. A linchpin for the Dubai Hills (and nearby) communities to gather and share slices. The supple crimson leather of their expansive, tiered dining room’s banquet seating holds bodies weary from the working day (week and month). A fully stocked bar anchors the back half, flanked by bar stools and sports screens. A pop art collage of magazine covers raises a finger to Dubai’s chronic reliance on beige and skylines. This is Pitfire Pizza’s first licensed venue (well, dedicated licensed venue, let’s overlook Time Out Market), where a very reasonably priced wine and cocktail menu exemplifies Pitfire Pizza’s down-to-earth joie de vivre. Wine peaks at AED 44 a glass, Prosecco at AED 35 and cocktails well below AED 60. (Order the mezcal-laced Hot Honey Margarita, and don’t look back.)
As Bill and Michele discovered, there is a lot to learn about pizza. Michele will tell you about Bill’s fascination with pizza making in an admiring ‘men develop hobbies after a certain age’ tone. It’s paid off. Michele is often the creative force behind the brand, from pizza creativity to delivery box artwork. Change be damned, there’s a consistency across Pitfire Pizza’s venues that fancier restaurants could learn from.
To pull back the veil and let you in, I met Michele Johnson years ago at their fabled Jumeirah Lakes Towers branch after years of facelessly ordering the Plain Jane online (mozzarella, provolone, oregano — don’t sleep on it). Michele talked passionately about tomatoes and dough fermentation. We ate The Palm (once Bill’s favourite, I believe): an alchemic tussle of bresaola, scorched rosemary, and the sugar-rich chew of local dates tempered with gorgonzola’s salty funk, all dribbled with aged balsamic vinegar. It’s now my favourite. I joked that good pizza is like good sex and great pizza is like, well, you get it. We’ve stayed in touch ever since.
And, just like sex, everyone likes their pizza a certain way. Some like it meaty and spicy (hello, Pepperoni Primo). The Truff Daddy is a generous mouth filler of mushrooms, two cheeses, black truffle and sweet caramelised onions. There are not one, but two pineapple Hawaiian pizzas for those who dabble in things they wouldn’t tell their friends. You can’t have tops without bottoms, and the sturdy, charred Pitfire Pizza bases convert and divide. “Embrace the char”, their delivery boxes exclaim. Suppose all this double entendre was not enough. Pitfire’s Pizzas come in a fulfilling ten inches or a knee-trembling fifteen, making “Bill’s Special fifteen-inch” a blushing order I enjoy saying as much as I love eating.
Back at our table, light boneless chicken wings with barbecue sauce arrive, followed by peppery rocket salads shingled with Parmesan shavings (for those wanting a carb-light meal). Mrs EatGoSee tucks into a black truffle linguine of soporific portions. But, seriously, don’t sleep on the Pitfire pastas. A glossy, creamy caramelised onion and goat cheese sauce is Lizzo-level thicc. The chicken penne alfredo sauce - also made in-house - is so moreish you’ll find me thumbing and licking the bowl when Mrs EatGoSee isn’t looking. It’s the kind of elbows-on-table casual eating that demands it. We throw down Blue Ribbon beers, Magners cider and off-menu Cosmopolitans before sharing a final round of Michele’s Apple Pie: the love-child of an American apple pie and a crumble. (Get vanilla ice cream as an extra.)
Pitfire Pizza Dubai Hills, Would I Return?
There are fancier restaurants in Dubai. I have visited many of them. But what makes for “the best restaurant” is a fervent debate among me and other food writer establishment. We know the ones with stars and toupes and list spots. Those places are not only good, but they are often exquisite. I would argue that the best restaurants - in Dubai or elsewhere - are the places that earn our repeat business. Is a place you rarely go to better than one you visit all the time? Places for gatherings, solo dining, and quiet retreats.
My dad celebrated his birthday in Dubai, and he demanded The Palm 15” plus Michele’s Apple Pie amidst the crippling grip of a hangover. We ate Pitfire twice more in two weeks since this family gathering. Yet another visit is imminent. Every time I walk in, I know someone there. A neighbourhood restaurant that just gets it. Where the owners are in the kitchen and on the floor. It is a place that does not cost the Earth, but there is still valet because this is still Dubai, after all.
Pitfire Pizza Dubai Hills, How Much Was It?
Garlic knots, large portion, AED 34
Boneless chicken wings with garlic mayo, AED 45
Whipped feta with caramelised onions, AED 50
Black truffle linguine, AED 64
Pepperoni Primo 15”, AED 83
The Palm 15”, AED 84
Michele’s Apple Pie, AED 27
Water carafes still and sparkling, AED 15
Pabst Blue Ribbon beer, AED 35
Magners cider, AED 58
Cosmopolitan, AED 40
Cuvee Sabourin Chardonnay, AED 150 a bottle, AED 35
Pop It Now! Glera Spumante, AED 35
d' Arenburg The Stump Jump Shiraz, AED 42
Hot Honey Margarita, AED 58 (and there were MANY)
Espresso, AED 20
Written by Liam Collens // Read more reviews here. You can find Liam on Threads, Instagram or Facebook.
Pitfire Pizza, Dubai Hills Business Park, Dubai Hills, Dubai, United Arab Emirates. Call 04 572 9120 for reservations, or visit Pitfire Pizza’s website to learn more.
Card carrying member of this (delicious) religion for at least 6 years!
“You can’t have tops without bottoms” - brilliant 😂